Personal Charter

Just thot I'd need to post this in a public space:

PERSONAL CHARTER

April 5, 2011

Realising that secular objectives, no matter how interim, is both misplaced and destructive, that I shall strive insyaAllah and with Allah’s guidance, to fulfill my fullest potential, and also to bear responsibility of realising the potential of those under my care, which includes my wife and children, and be the most positive influence I can be to others that I come into contact with, to benefit the purpose that Allah has given to His creation.

September 18, 2009; 28 Ramadhan 1430H

For the next 5 years, my financial planning mission shall be:

• Benefactor to others

Work only for a worthy cause 

Secure dependents

1 Jan 2007 (with minor edits)

• I will ensure my life and my family will live a life of integrity according to values approved by Islam and social order;

I will be determined in ensuring we reach that goal while at the same time ensuring my parents are safeguarded;

including my wife and children; and our relations

• I will have determination that I build up through persistence and tenacity;

I will pursue those goals with bravery and courage, and not be stopped by fear

• I will pray that Allah protects my objective and makes it easy

I will also have understanding and tolerance for other people's viewpoints, perspectives, problems, concerns, and make it my own

• I will use my rational thought coupled with hope and prayer to its fullest ability and find the opportunities that life brings for the betterment of this life

If you can change the world... or perhaps just one person's thinking..

1. I am confronted with the possibility of putting myself right in the middle of the crossfire - the MRT project, with a controversial contract owner as a potential employer. As always, I'd need to examine my heart and pray the istikharah - not that I have even attended the interview.
2. To do this, I need to have a sincere positioning as to this opening. What is my role, and this role must be one that I can live with. Of course, the devil uses all sorts of bogeys to prevent decisiveness and encourage uncertainties - but alhamdulillah Allah has provided aql and also to reach out to Allah for hidayah.
3. Principles are as below:
• That I benefit the most people in my position of responsibility
• That I uphold truth and justice in my dealings. While this means exercising independent thought, this also means being able to discern the different roles of the different stakeholders.
• That I have the opportunity to do good to my family and to myself.. ie leave a legacy. 
4.  Now I've got that out of the way, let's examine facts about the MRT.
• by all accounts, extremely high cost vs all others. I'm not sure if inflationary effects and base raw material effects have been included in the consideration, but surely that is a question to be asked? Are the specifications common or there are additional features in the Malaysian design that seemingly inflated the costs to most worrying levels.
• That it seems rushed. The alignment has still not been sorted out for the Jalan Sultan, TTDI and perhaps other locations. The overall MRT masterplan is still out there somewhere. Yet this unsolicited MMC-Gamuda bid has been awarded at this inflated cost.
• Speaking of costs, does the Govt know how to value projects of this size? My prior experience in PBX2 seems to indicate they have no idea and the fact that there is willingness for the public sector to fund private sector profits indicate they are ignorant of a proper funding structure for these PPP/PFI type projects.
• Auctioneering is necessary otherwise government will always be beholden. Will the private sector refuse generous terms? Are there kickbacks involved? I wouldnt want to know if there are - but these are dangerous times to turn a blind eye and a deaf ear to this types of development. The Arab Spring had "sprung" up in reaction to raging impotence to a sense of injustice. RM36b - RM50b can do that. The question will be what is the funding structure? Refusal to have open tenders, or a token Swiss Challenge, is insufficient.
• But again, Government is probably a bit smarter in that there is the added layer of building a "world-class private sector objective", although in this case, privatising profits is a strange way of doing it. There should be no additional subsidies / grants to support financing given the ridiculous profit margins for this and to consider the construction as purely a private sector play. Having said that, where is the breakeven for the operators?
• And here GoM has the trumpcard of a property play for the sites. And so, there is the answer for a rather complex equation. Does this mean the numbers work out? That remains to be seen.
5. So what would my role be? Primarily to deliver value to the company, increase credibility of the engineering profession, and ensure I turn out fine insyaAllah. May Allah guide me in my affairs.

Wisdom-oriented direction

1.       I’d like to achieve wisdom. The kind where I can read what this mat Salleh write, and I don’t go into automatic naivete mode thinking how great their research has been, but that it is merely a teaser to their greatest strength, which is to market and influence others to believe in their superiority. The internet does not help to overcome this inferiority complex.

2.       So what should happen is that the automatic reflex is to chunk up the information up to understanding people’s motivations, which are by and large driven by materialistic and capitalistic tendencies.

3.       Big question is, am I already afflicted? Take today’s call from a potential DF buyer. It was quite clear that I wanted the deal to be purely on price, but did I need to be unnecessarily harsh? Even with the agent? Where is my akhlak? It is in moments like this that I despair of what I have become after almost four years here. Nevertheless this is what I need to overcome. Ensure the automatic response is the ones not meant to impress the capitalists, but one where I can use the brief transactional exchange to further the image of Islam, to please Allah.

4.       It then becomes quite clear that I’d need to fill up my spiritual self with love of the Word of Allah, as that IS wisdom. How far apart have I gone? I need to come back. As it is, this already a poor influence on others in my family.

5.       Then it comes back to this Decision. The risks. The potential opportunities. All driven with sustaining the current lifestyle – but the real non-variable should be that family development will go by the rails / guidance that has been shown in light of this Wisdom. Hubbud-dunya wakara hiyatul mawut. Again, such a sensitive decision and how I need to deal with this with akhlak.

6.       Then the question is how do I deal with the naysayers, even those close to me? Challenge is to derisk all possible initiatives carefully, and to take care that it’s not about not taking risks, but to take carefully evaluated risks.

7.       But the other point is on courage and determination. And this comes from my relationship with Allah. The tawakkal part. While at the same time ensuring that I commit fully to the project. There is no shortcut. There is no exit. And realizing that the relationship with Allah is not because I have something that I want or need, but it is because He is the Almighty  Creator that I bow down to.

8.       And then again realizing how far away I’ve dropped off to. And how far is the distance that I need to close, but only then comforted by the fact that if I walk towards Allah, Allah will run towards me. I have had my share of the darkness. This is but one of those episodes. Do I then throw my hands up in the air or do I try to find a light?

Reflection on thought processes

the trick to keeping your sanity involves keeping your mind working actively.

There are many ways to think of the current turmoil I, and by extension my wife and family, are under at the moment, through that could be slightly overexaggerating it when compared to the plight of others.

One, is my gullibility and by extension by ability to correctly diagnose situations and   my judgment in people. The 'happy-happy' perspective, as elaborated by husnul-dzan concepts that I've used to good effect all these while are really truisms that need to be tested against the test of evidence and circumstance. Idealism should not be replaced with laziness to think and putting in the effort to adapt accordingly.

Two, there are thugs that we should be sensitive to, to have a zealousness to safeguard and protect our reputation and credulity. In most circumstance, when dealing with a close circle of family, friends and confidante, it's important not to let the ego become so bruised that a totally avoidable altercation happens. Berlapang dada starts when we trust our close circle. Trust. And although I could be espousing these concepts verbally, in actions is where it counts. 

Three, controlling personal feelings of helplessness, loneliness. it is important to control the narrative of our own life story - at least allow us the ability to dictate and decide our own circumstance and reality to the extent that where possible, that decision was made with clear understanding of implications. The victim mentality suits no-one except for manipulative leaders intent on getting the fight and the fire to respond to that instinct. In our own minds, the victim mentality must be managed to allow us to fight, within reasonable parameters of course, and motivate us to obtain what we truly want.

Four, nothing truly worthwhile is obtained in life by doing nothing and relying purely on hand-outs, empathy, sympathy and sychopantic dependence on others. Most worthwhile endeavors require vision, passion and the heedless determination to shape reality. Take Rasulullah. Take other great but in relation lesser achievements of military generals, political and business leaders. This is the essence of leadership. Without this special ingredient, we fail the test of life, and of living.

Miscellaneous reflections

1. Too many things unsettled - feeling of drifting, losing control, losing perspective etc - after the many "structural" changes in the past few weeks. Key concern is that because of these circumstances, more decisions could be made taht further aggravates these outcomes.
2. Major changes in the past 2 months include: Sarah's employment coming to a close, Mak going for umrah trip with Zana and Amran, Ummi's Turkmen trip and "slipped" C3-C4 disc , moving house, taking a more proactive role in managing the kids, etc. I have yet to be able to reflect on the ominous changes these entail.
3. The key thing to manage now is make sure any other decisions affecting structural changes must be made with care and caution. The key thing is that the end vision must be very clear in the mind.

Calibrating My Personal Charter

PERSONAL CHARTER



April 5, 2011

Realising that secular objectives, no matter how interim, is both misplaced and destructive, that I shall strive insyaAllah and with Allah’s guidance, to fulfill my fullest potential, and also to bear responsibility of realising the potential of those under my care, which includes my wife and children, and be the most positive influence I can be to others that I come into contact with, to benefit the purpose that Allah has given to His creation.


September 18, 2009; 28 Ramadhan 1430H

For the next 5 years, my financial planning mission shall be:

• Benefactor to others
• Work only for a worthy cause
• Secure dependents

1 Jan 2007


I will ensure my life and my family will live a life of integrity according to values approved by Islam and social order

I will be determined in ensuring we reach that goal while at the same time ensuring my parents are safeguarded;
including my wife and children; and our relations



I will have determination that I build up through persistence and tenacity;

I will pursue those goals with bravery and courage, and not be stopped by fear


I will pray that Allah protects my objective and makes it easy

I will also have understanding and tolerance for other people's viewpoints, perspectives, problems, concerns, and make it my own

I will use my rational thought coupled with hope and prayer to its fullest ability and find the opportunities that life brings for the betterment of this life

Return to the origins

1. Bahasa has this nice proverb saying "kembali ke pangkal jalan" to signify life's typical journey of returning to fundamentals whenever we veer away from where we intend to go.
2. I've always had this feeling of chasing after money, no matter how interim, that objective becomes a domineering overwhelming instinct that eats up all our efforts, time and resources. No matter how noble the intent can be, ie looking after my family's interests and financial demands, it then becomes the mechanism where the original direction will be lost. There will be no balance, no proportion, and looking for proportion no matter how clearly it resides outside of the workplace now, it would be imbalanced when we lose the sense that Allah is the overriding, primary aim of life.
3. It has taken Sarah's leaving to ignite that need, now becoming a temporary single parent would naturally increase that reliance on Allah which I had quite conveniently left it by the wayside. It is time to return.
4. Just to add to the sense of unrealness, RTC has now initiated a video screening of proof that Anwar cannot control his Thamby. Talk of the inadequacy of someone raising libel on others. I cant visualise any other person with this kind of background displaying such a disregard of personal embarassment and shame, inability to find remorse and accountability, and no feeling of political responsibility to chase a personal vendetta. Society needs clean, clear-thinking, above this dirty politics that UMNO has become so synonymous with. I do feel a personal calling in this regard, and the call of money seems to be the only obstacle holding me back.
5. Elsewhere, Fukushima will result in a much increased cost of nuclear generation, and it remains to be seen if coupled with variability of oil price whether this could really push the envelope for RE generation, no matter how un prepared it is to become mainstream currently and the demands of subsidies to get it up. Certainly a business opportunity.
6. Wifey is overseas for the next 2 weeks - I'm bearing the brunt of the work at office and home in that period. I'll have to decide if this is worthwhile as a full-fledged career. Nevertheless, the demands of a PIBG Secretary, a business matching organiser, a scientific advisory technopreneur and a trainer could certainly be a productive alternative. 

Malays, Chinese and other non-malays

1. Utusan went to town Saturday on PAS back-tracking and giving support to the Malay agenda. TERAS Chairman (?) said that the Malay economic issues must be addressed satisfactorily and not be glossed over by Pakatan Rakyat. In Primaya, there was this CNY celebration which was quite strange as it was the first time a Chinese celebration was held there after 3 years. Reading MI makes you want to knock your head against a wall when Chinese chauvinists go over the top in their criticisms of anything UMNO. (and you can sort of visualise the kid gloves when talking about MCA or other non-Malay partners in the BN)
2. There is truly a need to go to a common concensus on upholding basic principles. Addressing the truth for instance is a good start. So, call a spade a spade if you must, no covering up. (what was the word scully used again? obfuscation?) That goes not just to Chinese chavs, but also the more blinkered of all politicians.
3. Let's start by listing too many of the contentios issues and try to lay it down to rest once and for all. First, is UMNO a British stooge who won independence? To my knowledge, this is not true. Looking from the British perspective, once decolonisation became a policy due to the burden of maintaining far-flung colonies, there was only the question of who their preferred partner will be. Regardless of the fact that their insistence on the Alliance arose from the fear of "islamist" / left-leaning elements in Hizbul Muslimin or other less savoury alternatives, the due process was accorded and recognition must be given when there was support to the Alliance from the populace (through democratic elections) as well as the monarchs of the federated states. In the end, the federation model and its subsequent Constitution became the de facto model of the state. The question of a British stooge does not arise.
4. Social contract - citizenship in return for power, and later on the acceptance of Malay dominance through its monarchs and special position. That remains, and should not be questioned.
5. NEP was introduced, and was the right prescription for the issues of economic disparity amongst the races in the 60s. (It should have brought about greater social cohesion. The fact it does not means that the pendulum has swung too much the other way)
6. So now that I have affirmed UMNO's position, there is no issue right? Wrong. UMNO has made major mistakes - the vasectomy of judiciary prime amongst the loss of confidence in public policies. Malays are angry that the Malay-centric policies do not benefit the general classes, the non-Malays are angry at continued marginalisation due to the ineffective execution of Malay-centric policies as a whole. in 3/08, the Opposition made massive political inroads.
7. Then they started making a mess of things. Instead of taking on issues they were mandated to do, like becoming a more effective public administrator, they started to act like UMNO 2.0 and BN 2.0. Politicking about taking over the federal govt through the backdoor. Acting like schoolkids on the Perak takeover. Bleeding elected reps, members and supporters - no signs of coagulation yet. Talking daft things on changing State constitution, not recognising a Federally appointed State Sec, even when procedures have been followed etc. Token support for justice in the form of ISA etc, but full-blooded support when one of their own is "unjustly treated' - DSAI, TBH etc. If BN thot the voters are daft, PR acted like the voters are daft. At least, BN is actively wooing neutrals and fencesitters. PR acts as if the votes they gained in 2008 are their perennial property.
8. In the end, here we are. The Chinese electorate are invigorated. They are sophisticated, socially instinctive to safeguard their own interests and unwilling to take risks as regards to their self-interest. The Indians are too fragmented to impact on the political scene, so the stakes are between the large Malay electorate and the solid Chinese king-makers.
9. What of my personal view? The need to always speak the truth, stand up for truth. If anything, the issues are still issues of what people will bring to eat at the table. Looming global challenges are looming. Our politicians continue to squabble about the arrangement of the deckchairs on the Titanic after crashing into the iceberg. Chinese issues and Malay issues are different, but the solution is the same. Return to the needs of social justice and equality. The same concepts that Islam came to enforce. Let us not be too defined by the colour of our skin. Malays have progressed since 1969, we are no longer a race of fishermen and farmers. Many are now professionals. Unfortunately, the continued awkward execution of NEP means that we are now a race of government officers, GLC professionals, toll booth operators, bank tellers, and others. Create a level playing field. Let the Malays compete. Let them find the solutions. Let the government step back. Allow Islamists to dominate Malay society. At least we wont be reading daily news items of abandoned babies.

Disequilibrium

Resolution against disequilibrium

1. Quick thinking on your feet, rationalisation, and then speed of execution is important. Risk mitigation, opportunity realisation, sharing of benefits with others and not being too self-centred, firmness of position. All these are important facets of the thought processes taking place mentally when assessing something new.
2. When these complexities are arrested or deferred on the basis of procrastination, then all else fails to function as everything is left hanging. Sort of the multi-coloured rainbow roulette of the Mac, or the infamous hourglass of Windows. Only when resolution is forthcoming is everything rebooted, so to speak.
3. That is how I must approach the disequilibrium of the new corner house. Lots of other things hinges on this resolution.

Cant see Roy turning this around

1. Roy is at it again. I think the last full game that I watched was the 2-0 defeat against Everton. He's utterly hopeless.

Learnings on leadership, need for project tracking

Leadership

1.       It is so much more comfortable to lead than to be led. But power distance studies done by Hofstedes is interesting. There are cultures, and of course made up of individuals who are uncomfortable with wielding power, such as the Swedes. Not so the malays who come from hierarchical feudalistic backgrounds. Leaders are expected to lead. Abdication, syura, discussion – kalau boleh tak payah la…

2.       That’s the funny thing. So here I am needing to decide on where I go. I’m being pressured to lead in the traditional sense, rather than being who I am. Examining my heritage, there is a certain suspicion of power and authority, one I detedted since shildhood that made me slink out from being given the responsibility of headboy in primary school, that made me silently back away from being a prefect. In one sense, this made me lose out on developing innate skills to develop large groups, to stand in front, make my opinions known, seize the moment so to speak, stand my ground but it is who I am. Here when I need to my position wrt the crossroads, I need to derive a certain authority and power to make things happen.

3.       I need to stand firm on what I want, communicate innermost thoughts, understand transmitter motivations and things should flow from there. Again, these are the back-to-basics which needs to be done, executed, action-orientation. Convey the key messages well, and monitor that the key messages get to be translated into action, not just by me individually, but my immediate inner circle. Widening the circle then becomes the next phase of leadership. Gaps should be identified and addressed. Strategy, and action, and back again.

4.       In a nutshell, leadership is about getting right transmission of the key message of where we want to go. Action point: tazkirah, family meeting, blog writeups, lunchmate discussions. My utmost appreciation of Allah’s creation of our lisaan as an instrument of leadership, Alhamdulillah, subhanallah.

 

Project tracking

5.       Some items just never get moved: going wallclimbing, swimming, agriculture, tendering my resignation etc. I need a platform for synthesizing the different knowledge, otherwise the clutter in the noggin just doesn’t facilitate thinking on my feet, and therefore hinders whatever I intend to do. Sunday mornings look the best bet, or rather, very late at night.

 

 

 

 

Continuing turmoil in PKR; Back to basics; Concerns on the future; Bravery and courage to stand up for truth

Continuing turmoil in PKR;

1.       DSAI was labeled a dinosaur by Dr Asri recently. How can we be definitive and decisive about such a divisive figure in Malaysian history. And I say this as a compliment, not as a source of deriding and spin the likes that Utusan is fond of.

2.       DSAI has many strong point – his convictions, principles and courage are exemplary. His ability to convince and articulation of thoughts on issues of values and morality is legendary. Mass mobilisation in 74, 98 nad thereafter are examples of these abilities. The negatives however would be to see how he synergises, builds and leaves a legacy of success once he is gone, a true test of leadership. Dependence on DSAI is now such that people see without him, PR would spiral back into chaos. And that is a huge problem, an acide test of leadership not a sign of it. I shall hold the similarities with Hitler and comments made by Dr Rozhan on the dangers of charismatic leaders, but again this is a warning sign.

3.       If we want Malaysia to stand on truth, the realities of the community, on principles of diversity and success – then old-timers such as LKS, Karpal must go. DSAI should begin to plot how Malaysia should stand as a democratic nation found on ideals of liberty, plurality and respectful religiosity (– not secularism) – you know, stuff that DSAI has lectured the world over, and find concrete action steps to do this, not on rhetorics and speeches alone. The PKR elections is a clear demonstration of a botched execution for all to see – no denial should be done, but clear up this mess and stop blaming others. DSAI should be magnanimous enough to do this, and more from within the party should do this. There should be an avenue for PKR young turks to rise within the party, ingrained with the principles and ready to take decisive action.

 

Back to basics

4.       The need to go back to basics on qiyam, tilawah, reflections on tafseer, jamaah and superegoratory prayers, fatherhood and role modeling, ma’thurat; NJ is on the verge of being terminated yet still active in delivering aid and support to flood-stricken areas in Kedah, JL is talking about the creation of a Hidayah Centre TC in KK with a cadre of muslim preachers, the need to setup hospital visits, plans are afoot for a high-impact program on inter-faith dialogue on science, society and etc, the selling of ibn Kathir’s tafseer, and these were good timely reminders.

5.       Missing solat Isya’ and Fajr are examples of hypocrisy – so extra effort should be made to pray this at the surau.

6.       Personal strength should be based on these simple acts, and these should be my jihad.

 

Concerns on the future

7.       These are clearly concerns I need to take heed of, and if I can surmise them:

• Strengthen basic ‘amal
• Think through positions, seek alternative views and promulgate your own
• Think through best ways to effect change, be brave and have bold BHAG ideas – be a mover and shaker
• Strengthen networks

 

Bravery and courage to stand up for truth

8.       At the end of the day, once I set my position, think through what are the best ways to effect those changes with lasting stickiness. No small amount of bravery is required, and again this comes from the strengthening of the core through back to basics amal.

 

 

ESQ Parenting 101010

ESQ Parenting 1010

 

ESQ is now 10 yrs, and seeks to be neutral. 420 staff, pretty impressive growth.

 

Delivery done in multimedia, rah-rah interspersed with introspection, very different to traditional Islamic madrasahs. In a way, it's a very much underdeveloped way of education transmission, although there is a hadith that the Prophet asked that the transmission be done bil-hikmah. Emotional "manipulation" is perfectly done. While motivations and learnings are good and maximises introspection, content and the after-effects of increased personal awareness would be better if related to tazkiyyah, tarbiyyah and jamaah. Later, the question of how-to and "after-care" support will be raised and takes up a different question. I can probably surmise it as it should not be seen as a religious education, although it speaks the same language, and most importantly, should be how Islam is conveyed in this day and age.

 

Everything is carefully stage-managed. Very professional, and I would say it's world-standard. Symbolisms, imagery, sounds, music, voice intonations - all served to deliver. Some messianic imageries is a bit concerning, but I guess it's part of marketing. To be nit-picking, it's not all about Ary's parents, everyone in the hall has parents. Otherwise, training brief and learnings served to emphasise the points extremely well.

 

Several controversies that were raised before were I think dealt with, except for one or two things. God-spot is now replaced with fitrah, to mean suara hati. Manacles referring to nafsu(?). Hati dilingkungi oleh 6 rukun iman, dan 5 rukun Islam. But later there was also a reference to a God-spot in oursleves while pointing to the head, so is that a yes or no? Anyway, there are better ways to convey this content surely, and adaptation of business management concepts and precepts should be done but the overarching framework of our understanding of Tauhid should be firm and unwavering, but also with an updated delivery style. The understanding of Tauhid and Zaat of Allah goes through the Ahlus Sunnah wal Jamaah's way of tauhid uluhiyyah, rububiyyah and asma' was sifaat should be retained, and within that context the elements of Maqasid Syariah and all should be used as a mission building capacity using these modern business approaches.

 

In essence, the process part is the delivery, the content should be the Syariah-advisor responsibility.

 

Content is where the training is excellent, and succeeds in moving my own personal paradigms, views and outlook towards creating a tamadun, a multi-generational commitment to khilafatu fil-ardh, and especially of the parenting mission: pengabdian penuh kpd Allah 51:56, fulfilling of covenants  7:172, fulfilling role as khalifah 2:30, preparing for life's realities, accountability 75:36, Reminder of Vision is excellent. Must enhance vision! Middle / average is not good enough, and I do need to update, enhance and expand these previous do'as of mine - "+Naeem's rounded personality devt,+Husna's quiet leadership, +Hadi's excellent leadership, +Hafiz's human touch and love"

 

Crowd –I think there is this admiration bordering on awe, but I must stress this is the delivery portion. The cause, content and veneration should be limited to that which comes from the Almighty, as contained in the Book and the Sunnah of the Prophet. I think Pak Ary made this point clear on many occasions throughout the 1 day, and I don’t see this as misguided veneration of pak Ary or ESQ or even the “rituals”. I’ll try my damnedest to keep my comments fair lest I mistakenly damage someone’s reputation. Others should partake in guiding and providing the “after-care” services rather than criticizing from their high-chairs.

 

 

 

Week just ended review: Eid, People, RE

1.       Lessons from socialising, berayaing, and generally meeting other people

a.       Eid – of the one month variety is a great concept when it involves visiting and learning of the ways of others, their fears and concerns, their comforts and thoughts. I oppose the open house concept other than having an opportunity to gather the right ‘gang’ and clique at the right place at the right time. So, thus I guess our 3 “mini-open” houses this year.

b.      This past weekend was a pretty good one. After the kids Kumon, we kicked off firstly with Villa Sutera, where lessons of articulation and speaking a lot more than expected can be distilled. Then, it was a Kinrara trip, where a property investment opportunity presents itself. And also, the fact that I have a marketing agent to turn to in the future should I need one.

c.       The night ended with a Raya-cum-residential meeting, the post-mortem from a recent break-in just 2 days before, baying loudly for the security guards to strap up and do work properly. Sitting back, the baying of blood from the masses is a source of concern to me, primarily when I don’t feel it serves its purpose of enhancing security. First, is the fact that neighbours need to be vigilant and keep a lookout for each other. Secondly, security needs to be in your face, and no resident should raise an objection to this. Thirdly, technology solutions should be optimised. This is a position I should stand firm on, and kacau the rightful AJK constantly of the need to go beyond the superficial mingling. I see a mini-open house for the gang, Nik, KJ, J etc is in order.

d.      MAD followed the next day. Again, after not doing anything in JDC for the last 2 years despite sitting on the committee, and from a larger picture, not doing anything for the last 8 years, I contributed to drafting a resolution for dissolution of the branch. Ironic! But after giving it much thought, it is the best alternative, and when put to the vote, it was accepted by a thumping 20-10. Key learning points, Menang dimension is in effect, and it feels good to be able to lead in the though process when everyone else is trapped in the miasma.

e.       Then, it was a lightning trip to Putra Hts, and again the GIH connections loom everywhere, before a quick trip to FZ’s. Nice prime property, highly in demand etc, but so dead in terms of life and society. Give me Primaya any day. Quick mental note on next home, overlooking Masjid, security, corner at least.

f.        Amran’s was next – Mum is now 2 weeks with an ailment from whose description I’m guessing its septicimea, the same that brought down Arwah. His dedication to my old place is exemplary, but I get the nagging feeling that in the greater scheme of things that this is extremely misleading and suboptimal. You don’t get educated at the best Ivy league universities to negotiate CAs and become union activists – leave this to the proper MTUC types and use the gifts of intellect and articulation where it is best suited. Engineering sector in Malaysia is extremely stagnant, and no one has made a proper stab at marketing our  intrinsic capabilities thus far. As much as I hate to say it, Francis Yeoh has been one of the few who has managed this extremely well (leaving aside the lop-sided sweetheart deal he is the beneficiary of). Note – pls make dua for his mom, and dus that I have the strength to conduct and do what is right for the engineering fraternity who opts to stay in the technical line, rather than leaving to work in the more lucrative financial sector, or leaving to the Middle East.

g.      Wan Roslan was dropping a hint that his employers will be proceeding with an ETP identified mega project soon. Worth checking out this lead.

h.       Mak was still waiting for Fiza, but at the same time, I felt sorry that I did not participate in providing a valid excuse for her to recuse herself from joining CIk Yah’s trip to Gambang.

 

2.       Lessons from others

a.       And then there was this morning. I should appreciate my wife more, she’s helpful despite not feeling the best of health.

b.      My own slipping iman, as seen from solat times, is a concern. More of the Ramadhan spirit needs to be invigorated. Mujahadah this week to finish off the Syawwal fasts, zakat to JDC, and qurban to Kemboja.

c.       Hodgson – good or lousy? I quote buy the player power sidestory, as even a crappy 442 formation should still be good enough to overpower Blackpool, as we did in the 2^nd half. But the late / inadequate subs, the wrong personnel, the lack of a plan B, the lack of drive and motivation.. on the whole as of now, we’re slipping fast and need urgent remedial action. Professorial dithering isn’t good enough, sorry.. we have too much of that in the workplace already.

 

3.       RE interests and opportunities

a.       There is a reason why engineers shouldn’t do sales, marketing, and it was evident this morning. Siemens had as their conference launch gimmick a dance troupe wearing reflective costumes, then cornily raising highlighted promo phrases associated with climate change, you know the phrases that jumps out in the powerpoints. Message lost. Don’t bother next time.

b.      Dinner tonight, but I’d need to understand who to target and questions to ask. Perhaps can start with questions on what are the opportunities when the industry is so fragmented. Service integrators, legal and regulatory advisers / consultants?

 

 

 

Reflections of Eid, and the future

1. Fikiranku kusut dan tidak teratur akibat cuti dan perayaan. I also
submit that I'm single-tracked and find it difficult to imagine
juggling the many issues and perspectives related to it, or what is
commonly associated with cognitive dissonance, the latter a trait of
great political leaders.

2. Eid
Eid is a day of going back to fitrah. And alhamdulillah the last days
of Ramadhan allowed me to connect a little beyond the superficial, and
I realise what I've been missing now. Maher Zain's message is deep,
and tears flowed freely as I relive the dua and enduring hope of Mercy
from the Almighty.

Somewhat soured were the familiar familial dissatisfactions expressed
by my other half. I can only try to pujuk and ask for patience and
forbearance, as that shown in the Sunnah, and that espoused by good
character.

3. LTIP and wealth distribution
Alhamdulillah for the bumper payout. Two concerns are on what are
allocations for distributions, and also, how does this risk / impact
the planned leaving of K.

4. Dakwah and personal contribution
I still want to remain true to this trajectory and ask Allah that I am
strengthened in my resolve.

--
Sent from my mobile device

Knowing thyself

1.       This is a question that I avoid trying to find the answer to, knowing that I may not like the answer. But again, the confusing thing about it is that there is no reason to dislike, but using the answer ad infinitum to find the actions, tasks, efforts and initiatives necessary to achieve significant legacies and success. This objective being defined and guided by need to achieve the highest values of mardhatillah

2.       The most difficult thing to do is to overcome the inner compunction to avoid, to let it be, not to kacau stuff. On that score, I am reminded of Hasrizal’s (Saiful Islam) article on the goose that lay the golden egg. Isnt this similar to the goose committing suicide? Isnt this death before its time? Isnt this the cowards way of retreating at the mere mention of an impending doom sometime in the future.

3.       How difficult it is to fill the heart with courage when the mere mention of risk scurries the body away from meeting its fiend. Strengthening the heart is of utmost importance. The greater the deed, the greater does its strength need to be.

4.       And within this context is where the beauty of qiyam lies. The vulnerability of the helpless slave prostrating in front of his rightful Lord, untainted by all other false Lords and devils feigning authority. The stripping away of this weakness helps to fill the heart with courage and strength. Emotions will trump intellect in the larger dimensions of war and competition. Witness the various ayaah, the various historical relics and evidences, and yes, the various football results where the little trumps the large when character comes to the fore.

5.       Ya Allah, please help me develop this strength of heart and character to be your slave with Your Glorious Mercy. Allow me to taste the sweetness of fighting for your cause, in the name of a war that You approve, the Jihadul Akbar that Your Prophet has called for, my Lord.

 

 

Learning Points a-plenty

Learning Points a-plenty in the past eventful week.

 

1.       Mak needs her space,and even if that is not agreeable by my standards, I’d need to accept it and move on. She has her own way of dealing with things, and my role is to provide an alternative viewpoint, not to force it on her. This would a valuable learning point to be taken from the Menang perspective – you must work hard to ensure your perspective is heard, your spin is acceptable, and the logic impeccable. These are the main barriers to support to the ideas, and the task orientation arising from overcoming these barriers would be invaluable to the action and execution mode. Similarly, this is the mode that I’ve got to take up in dealings with other stakeholders. Witness the effect of explaining why “Gemuk” moniker is unacceptable. The little time invested into explaining the situation has caused a complete drying up of a simple unwanted behaviour amongst my first three boisterous children. Subhanallah for Allah’s creations, and for His ordering of the universe, and for His sending of the Prophet to teach us the simple, most effective ways of dealing with people.

2.       Execution mode – listing, reminders, task, productivity tools on the Berry are useful complementarities to Task-orientation. Make sure I’ve got this covered, and may Allah continue to bestow the ease with which to continue doing this.

3.       BHAGs – property in Damansara area, opening up of Islamic school in Damansara, driving a 5-series, masterplanner of agri land for recreation, rehab and commercial agri, large funder of  worthwhile causes – the Magic of Thinking Big to drive motivation. And why not me? I’ve had experience in project delivery – dealing with DBKL,other agencies, private developers, consulting – selling ideas, creating spin, masterplanning, managing resources, objective-centred activities though results may have fallen short in some ways, investment – financial management, due diligence, investment evaluation, and in many ways, quite well-placed to bring critical, overwhelming leveraged results from important endeavours, insyaAllah.

4.       On item 3, the World Cup is a wonderful eye-opener. England, Italy, Germany, Spain are unsure of their place in Round 2, though I believe they will all still qualify (unlike France), and South & North Korea and Japan are still in with a shout (tho I believe only the first will make it). It just goes to show that money isn’t everything, and heart and determination is a more important factor. I’d have to decide which I should have more of. This is now my biggest crossroads since 2002 when I thought that TNB will not be my long-term career choice. The (mini)-pilgrimage effects are still felt.

5.       and that brings me to yesterday’s Ikram launch. The opportunities are there. The battle lines are slowly being drawn. But perhaps the capabilities are more of the same? The question is, how can I be the catalyst to drive this, and myself, upward?

 

 

 

Rational actions, driven by spiritual and emotional equilibrium

1.       Note that it isn’t easy to be a leader, the “Menang” dimension. Engaging with emotion is a flawed process, where opposing views could only be rationalised and harmonised with great difficulty, if at all.

2.       There are remarks that Malays are an emotional lot, and that comes from not having the wherewithal to decide. This stems from uncertainty from aligning outcomes, fragmented methodologies unable to build concensus and buy-in, and inferior information and knowledge as inputs to form opinion. Without these thinking capabilities, rationalism is lost, and emotions and shouting takes precedence. Or in religiousity, we just follow whoever shouts the loudest, appears as the most knowledgeable and have a more religious outlook, or even, in the case of liberalist interpretation of Islam, a legalistic argument in favour of reforms and all appear very attractive. The other option is to be apathetic and follow the “truth” spouted out by Government. In Tun M’s time, as he had the capacity to use all media machinery, the latter was pretty much the typical position of the masses. But when Pak Lah, who had the good intentions for openness without the guts to control and mediate, the diffusion of ideas spread and anarchy takes root. In Najib’s case, borrowing Bakri Musa’s description of a leader who follows, there is no real guidance and leadership on issues.

3.       I guess the stand to teach people to think may have substance, but it wont be a core component of Menang for leadership of issues and opinions. In the short run, emotional leadership still takes precedence. So, positioning of issues is still important and requires good R&D, good access to corridors of power, and the smarts to use national media when required.

4.       First and foremost, lessons learned from the diplomatic antagonisms post-Mavi Marmara, is that we should be flexible in many instances, including strategic options. The only unchangeable, should be a broadly-defined purpose, objective to be achieved. In the process, the balancing of multiple ideas, even opposing ideas, should be entertained. The final decision, ijtihad, is one after taking into account all manner of outcomes, implications et al, and we hope we gain the benefit and barakah from Allah for the effort we put in to come up to the right decision, for our sake and for Islam’s benefit.

 

 

Midnight posting: Mind above materiality

1. Keheningan malam ini bagaikan ada kelainan dari sebelumnya. Ketenangandi dalam muhasabah dan mutabaah ini berbeza, mungkin didorong oleh rasa kekesalan dan kesalahan yang menebal.

2. The serene faces of sleeping children invokes feelings of loving,care and concern for their welfare, for their future, for their iman and self-development.

3. Not at this time the concerns for making the next million, of closing the x mn deal, of taking the soulless business to the next level. At the core of the human soul, there is no place for wealth, money, much less for the insane amounts that are placed into the hands of the undeserving.

4. This is not misplaced zuhud. True that the world needs money and wealth, but that is not the overriding purpose of life, of living and of creation. Those who say money is not everything does not know where to shop, so the quote goes. But which shop sells love, care and concern? Fake, temporal ones maybe. Redlight districts sell manifestations of love, but not the innermost core of love.

5. Wealth, funds, money are not the center of life. People are. Connections are. Faith is. How empty life seems to be when all we care about is what our bank balance is at the end of the day. At life's end, when the terminal arrives, no shop sells preparations to move to 'the next level'. Healthcare to extend life maybe, but perhaps not so much the quality of life. The dependence is above all, beyond everything, is the biggest gift of all, the gift of mercy, living and concern.


6. Lose this priority, and we're screwed. Damn right, we're all screwed.

Memories: Imperial Studies

Memories: Imperial Studies

1. It has been almost 15 years to the time I graduate and left my alma mater, but the true value of the education I received there seems to be amplified the longer time wears on.

2. I remembered the struggle and the suffering, contrasted with the gallivanting my brethren faced in LSE undergoing some artsy type education, pretending that they too were suffering. I remember the Eid where I spent the day at the lab, trying to make the circuit design work according to its cursed specs, and then still trying to squeeze the performance out of the stupid bugger. I remember almost failing in my 1st year after being unable to juggle my repsonsibilities and unable to discern between my capabilities and potential. I remember the passionate teachers, lecturers and professors, the Greek, Prof Spence, the Powerman - and the Brit colleagues who like me took a look at the Sings, and collectively decided, it aint worth it to be like them.

3. I wasnt happy with my results, I thot it wasnt commensurate with the effort that I put in. But I also realised that between effort and passion were two great gulfs. I studied in Imperial because I wanted the name, and I studied in E&E because it had practical relevance in what was to be my career in TNB then. I wasnt prepared for the slog though. Everything up to then had been a piece of cake, all I needed was a lot of last minute cramming, and things would turn out to be not so bad, or pretty great. I had no idea that there was a lot hinging on these little decisions, or that being good wasnt enough. Good is the enemy of great, is the champion of mediocrity. Until and unless you seek the frontiers of your chosen profession, your career, your choices, you'll languish.

4. That last statement could have been a little exaggerated, especially when I look around at this country and see the society that our mass production education system has produced. We can all live happily without straining ourselves to be the best that we can be. Ok, what. But wait, the undercurrents are very strong indeed, and it could just sweep us off our feet and drown us all.

5. Malaysia is now the 10th most competitive nation by one measure. Yet, that masks the fact whether our industrial policy has effectively cultivated manufacturing, industries and services around our resource advantages, or whether we have diversified away so that we are no longer masters of any. Socially, we are disintegrating except for the efforts by society to painfully gradually bring about change in spite of the leadership.. and that beings us to the issues that we face politically.

6. All these are manifestations of attitudes of individuals, where aggregated at society level, brings about the lethargy that we can obviously view without much effort now.

7. It all begins and ends with attitude. Be the best that we can be. Be disciplined enough to bring this change that we want to see. And change the system - we collaborate to bring about the change taht we want.. bit by bit, step-by-step, until we end up fulfilling our beliefs, either in life or in death.

Malaysian Politics and Economy

An admission – I’m just a layman not used to talk about policy-level issues on a local scale, let alone national scale. But I need to get this off my chest.

1.       KPIs are so last century, but hurray GoM is now implementing this as part of their alphabet soup of governance, as advised by the alphabet soup consultants!

2.       Sibu shows the Chinese electorate are a pretty sophisticated bunch who move as one big mass of body politic

3.       Hulu Selangor shows that the Malay-electorate can still be swayed by short-term financial perks – RM50k anyone? Same for Indian-electorate.

4.       Innovation & Technology, the pivot around where the NEM is supposed to sway on to bring us to the high-income territory, is just so bloody far away that I just cant see it happening

5.       The PM has shown that he’s no statesman – u don’t go around explicitly bribing your electorate

6.       Brain Drain shows no signs of abating, and I fear that it may pick up steam after the next GE “when” BN still wins majority seats because of no. 3 above

7.       The Opposition, while showing some promise to reverse some of these deep-seated fundamental problems, have major issues of credibility and leadership. Let’s take a look at national leaders – there’s DSAI – who has funnyman Saiful being a pain in the ass, quite literally – but beyond him….? LKS or LGE – oh please! Let’s not trade a bigot with another. Dzulkifly Ahmad, Nizar, Khalid Samad are too far away from the national consciousness.

8.       Malays are at an important crossroad – they must choose their future – let go of the easy money and be competitive OR milk the nation till everyone starves. You think they’ll be able to make the right choice?

9.       Malaysian sportsmen are our hope for a common, united Malaysia, but are let down by weak mentality. So hockey, badminton, football – not much success there to unite everybody. Squash – too much on the fringes.

10.   The most articulate young politicians are not given the platform to shape or to move policy, institutions or society. Those given opportunities are betrayed by inexperience, lack of ability, easily outmanouvered politically and most importantly in my opinion, let down by an inordinate exaggerated belief in one’s own ability. Personal conviction of youth is our main hope, and when we don’t have enough competition amongst apathetic, rotten, amoral, unethical, ambivalent youth raised in an ineffective education system to produce young leaders– we have a major problem.

11.   oh – item 10 – our education sucks. We need more of the Musleh schools – perhaps in an English medium, which makes them Adni schools. And that needs to be opened to all public, without restriction.

12.   Then there is the teachers – overworked, underappreciated, overwhelmed, stressed and scope creep continues unabated. But they get a nice big Selamat Hari Guru card from the PM… isn’t that sweet?

13.   Financial management of the country sucks. We have a Madoff-like institution giving out high returns regardless of its portfolio performance, we have a provident fund which is so risk-averse that at your retirement age, the average Malaysian will still not have enough, Zakat institutions that are.. I reserve judgment.

14.   We have in inordinate sense of self importance – why do we still protect Proton at the expense of all Malaysians? Btw TM stands for Terribly Mediocre – unbefitting of its status as a national fixed line operator that will soon rollout triple-play and quad-play products. Practise meritocracy and see what Digi does with this. And VW to partner Proton. Btw what happened with Proton’s acquisition of Lotus – Lotus is now dragged down to Proton’s level! CK says we can source out other hydro plants from Sarawak, but which will still need the submarine cable, which was too costly. Oh yeah, he won the Best CEO award, so we should be comforted. Come to think of it, who are the major shareholders of these companies?